You will need your order number and email/last 4 digits of your phone number.ģ. Repack your items.(These need to be unworn/unwashed/unused and with original tags)Ģ. You've got 28 days to send something back to us from the day you receive it.Ĭlick here to view our full Returns Policy.ġ. Please use a trackable service and keep your proof of postage receipt until after your refund is processed. Let’s see how much sports talk I can neutralize with that.BoohooMAN US returns are FAST, TRACKABLE & COST EFFECTIVE using the returns portalįor International returns you will need to pay for your return, you can find out the postage price in the portal or you will be asked to download a returns label and pay for postage at your local post office. My next step is to mix it up a little and invest in a Funkadelic T-shirt. This also means that though I’ll never blend into an environment, I can occasionally steer my presence into a non-basketball conversation. ![]() Many middle-aged White dudes love The Ramones more than basketball, and want to share that love with me when I’m wearing a Ramones T-shirt. Nice.Įxperiment 3: My son’s basketball game, cause now I’m cocky about it. Now my shirt is unleashing happy memories. I unclenched my jaw.Įxperiment 2: “Weird Al” Yankovic concert.Īs soon as I hit the third floor balcony, a middle-aged White dude looked at me from across the room and yelled “Nice shirt! I saw them at the Fillmore!”, spilling his overpriced craft beer in the process. But he only smiled, said “Nice shirt” and walked away, asking nothing about my height. A middle-aged White dude walked up to me while I clenched my jaw in preparation for THE QUESTION. I slipped on my new Ramones T-shirt and sauntered over to the bulk items section. ![]() One Amazon Prime purchase later I was ready to rock, so to speak. (Talkin’ to you, Green Day.) They also have a snazzy band logo. How about American punk icons The Ramones? Through 14 albums and 22 years of touring they never had a worldwide hit single but their speedy bubblegum riffs inspired hundreds of acts that did. If I wear a T-shirt from a beloved cult band, can I shift a stranger’s question from basketball to music? Since fashion is also a language, I decided to embark on a culture jamming experiment. My usual texts to friends include Spotify playlists, photos of vintage recording gear, and random observations like “Did you know Prince’s Erotic City doesn’t have any cymbals on it?” I’d discuss music with a complete stranger in a heartbeat, but unless I’m at a record store or a live concert, this type of conversation doesn’t start organically. I can wax rhapsodic about Kanye West samples, Shostakovich viola rhythms and Dorothy Asher harp compositions until I pass out from thirst. However, the culture I can speak to is music. Visually I’m speaking the language of basketball, a language of which I’m culturally illiterate. ![]() The bulk items section of Whole Foods might as well be ESPN’s SportsCenter when I show up to weigh some oat flour. I own zero professional sports jerseys, I rarely wear hi-top basketball shoes, and I tend to dress like a slightly arty, business-casual, Bay Area dad. And this phenomenon isn’t enabled by whatever I’m wearing at the time. The reptilian part of our brain makes snap decisions based on stimuli presented to it, and that stimuli says I probably played power forward for the NBA and might still have a sports lawyer on retainer. GENERIC EVERYPERSON (still rolling) Yadda-yadda-yadda are your kids tall?… FADE OUT ![]() GENERIC EVERYPERSON (confused, with a hint of hostility) What? Why? If I were your height I’d play all the time! Yadda-yadda-yadda Michael Jordan yadda-yadda-yadda high school coach yadda-yadda-yadda basketball-specific reference that I assume you understand… MARK (totally checked out) Uh-huh. GENERIC EVERYPERSON (beatifically) Do you play basketball? MARK (neutral, but like so over this) No I do not. Suddenly we see GENERIC EVERYPERSON approach him from the front, looking up at MARK’s height in amazement, mouth opening in slo-mo as a question stumbles out of it. STREET - DAY MARK is standing on a street corner, minding his own business. Every week a total stranger will ask me the same four-word question that I heard the week before, and the week before that, and every single week of my life for last 30 years. How I Hid My Extreme Height With a Ramones T-shirt
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